Sunday, February 21, 2010

My Prayer

Lord,
I pray for a man, that will be a part of my life
A man that really loves YOU more than everything
A man that will put me in the second place of his heart
A man that lives not for himself but for YOU
The most important is
I want a heart that really loves and thirsty of YOU
And have a desire to be like JESUS
And he must know for whom and for what he lives
So his life is not useless
Someone that has a wise heart
Not only a smart brain
A man that not only loves me but also respect me
A man that not only adores me
But can warn me when I am wrong
A man that loves me not because of my beauty
but my heart
A man that can be my best friend
in every time and situation
A man that make me feel like a woman
when I am beside him

I do not ask for a perfect man
But I ask for an imperfect man

A man that needs my support for his strength
A man that needs my prayer for his life
A man that needs my smile to cover his sadness
A man that needs my love so he feels being loved
A man that needs me to make his life beautiful

And I also ask
Make me be a woman that can make him proud
Give me a heart that really LOVES YOU
So I can love him with Your Love
Not love him with my love
Give me Your gentle spirit
So my beauty does not come from my outside
but comes from You
Give me Your hands
That always be able to pray for him
Give me Your eyes
So I can see many things in him
and not the bad one
Give me Your mouth
that is filled with Your wisdom
of wisdom and encouragement
So I can support him everyday
Give me Your lips
And I will smile at him every morning

And I want that when we finally meet
Both of us can say
How great Thou Art
I know that You want us to met at the right time
And You will make everything beautiful in Your time
Amen

My Simple Word II

banyak perkara yang tak dapat kumengerti
mengapakan harus terjadi di dalam kehidupan ini?
satu perkara yang kusimpan dalam hati
tiada sesuatu kan terjadi tanpa Allah peduli
Allah mengerti Allah peduli
segala persoalan yang kita hadapi
tak akan pernah dibiarkannya
ku bergumul sendiri sbab Allah mengerti

yaa bener banget, gue ngerasa banyak banget perkara yang gue nggak mengerti kenapa harus terjadi di hidup gue. kenapa Tuhan … (bla bla bla) ? kenapa kok … kaya gitu Tuhan? waktu itu gue nggak habis pikir dan terus menerus menyalahkan diri gue. tapi Tuhan cuma bilang, “Nak, Aku Allah yang ga pernah mengecewakan kalau kamu berserah dengan semua rencanaKu. jalani saja, biar nanti Aku yang beri hikmat dan pengertian.” dan yaa sekali lagi Allah kita itu memang Allah yang baik, gue berjuang hadapin masalah bersama Tuhan, sampai gue sadar gue semakin kuat lewatin semua masalah-masalah dengan Dia. Dia yang beri hikmat, Dia yang pulihkan keadaan hati gue, respon hati gue, Dia yang sembuhkan semua luka, segala sesuatu kutanggung di dalam Dia.

My Simple Word I

selalu ada saat seperti ini, saat gue ngerasa cape dan merasa sangat amat berhak mengeluh untuk kehidupan yang gue jalani. merasa lelah dengan makhluk bernama pria, berasa males ngadepin mereka. begitu letih mencintai seseorang dan kemudian harus meninggalkan perasaan itu. beneran gue nggak pengen jatuh cinta lagi. gue letih tiap malem harus bergumul dengan perasaan itu. kadang gue begitu tergoda untuk menutup hati gue dan menulis besar-besar di depannya “No Boy Please!” gue merasa akan lebih bahagia kalau begitu. no man no cry isn’t it? hahaha pengecut? yaah memang. but whatever! gue takut sakit lagi, jadi gue hanya perlu menutup diri gue dan gue ga akan disakiti lagi. saat ini gue cuma bisa berdoa Tuhan kasih keberanian untuk berjalan, berani untuk percaya. percaya bahwa Dia yang menjamin seluruh hidup gue. apapun yang terjadi, gue tahu Dia Allah yang baik. Dia yang akan kasih gue kemampuan untuk mencabut semua perasaan gue. Dia yang akan menemani gue menghapus semua air mata dan luka gue. gue percaya Dia nggak pernah ninggalin gue.